But as I keep being reminded life isn't as scripted and as neatly put into a bow as I would like. Rarely can you know all eventual outcomes before a situation starts. Sometimes you have to take the information given and make your best guess.
The Minnesota Timberwolves seemed to encounter this situation over the weekend. They thought they had a complicated but potentially exciting scenario all figured out, or in the least they felt like they had a path to a solution. Confidence was climbing. Excitement was building and then poof. The situation as they had seen it, the scenario as they understood it, changed in the blink of an eye when another team, unexpectedly used their leverage to disrupt Minnesota's plans.
The organization, the fans, the media then proceeded to examine what changed, what went wrong, what could or should have been differently. The fan base on social media went full wailing and gnashing of teeth - here we go again. The sky proceed to continue it's eternal free fall in the world of Timberwolves supporters.
Meanwhile, while the Timberwolves scenario was proceeding to play out, my mind was spending most of Sunday replaying choices, actions and decisions made in the preceding days. Whether it was examining every word of a message sent or a work related email, trying to determine if I was supportive but strong enough when it came to an important issue or even if I should have chosen a different song or shown more enthusiasm at karaoke. No issue is too big or too small for my mind to dissect, rebuild, tear back apart, turn into an enigma or mystery on par with the platypus.
I will think too much. Guaranteed.
Someone I follow on twitter talked about how it is hard for entrepreneurs to talk about their plans with non-entrepreneurs. Big dreams and taking big steps is scary and not for everyone. It can be easy to poke holes in a big plan or dream or too see the challenges instead of the possibilities. And big challenges often lead to failure.
The Timberwolves failed to get their desired free agent. I worry that a message or an email didn't come off as I wanted it to. I've stared at the same paragraph in a short story for weeks. Quinn and the Dream Riders still doesn't have an ending that I can accept. My goal of submitting to at least one writing contest each month has been scratched before lifting off each month.
It is tempting to give in. To allow the allure of failure, disappointment and awkwardness lead me to stop writing, stop looking, stop dreaming of something big. It is a chore some days to avoid picking up my toys and going home, so to speak.
I doubt that the Timberwolves will simply stop trying to improve their team because of this set back. Experience from the past makes many fans see this as a pattern and return to what is normal. My brain sees word choice, or writer's block or any small set back or lack of perfect outcome as a sign that nothing will work.
Ultimately, when I am faced with that awkward paragraph or empty page, when a moment doesn't go the way that I, Sherlock, Matlock or Jessica Fletcher expect, the only one who can decide to keep trying, to keep writing, to dream...is me.
So like the Timberwolves, Wayne Gretzky and Michael Scott, it is time to try again.
Time to take another shot.
